Guest Post: 5 Ways to Be the Worst Bridesmaid Ever

Are you a member of a bridal party who is tired of being kind and supportive? Largely inspired by a real-life Bridesmaidzilla, here are five ways to help you become a terrible bridesmaid:

5. Show up to the bride’s bridal shower. Late. In sweatpants.

This is a great way to show your disrespect. You can easily prove to the bride and all guests that you do not care by arriving late, dressed like a slob. Do not speak to anyone, and make sure that you are gone in no more than 45 minutes.

4. Plan the bachelorette party and then bail last minute because you can’t afford it.

Bonus points if you post photos of your “new ride” on Facebook immediately following the “I can’t make it” text message. Additional bonus points awarded if your new vehicle costs more than the bride’s entire wedding.

3. Give the bride unsolicited advice.

The further the advice is from being any of your business, the better. For example, suggest that she kick her sister-in-law to the curb as a member of the bridal party.

2. Refuse to shop with the bride and send photos of potential dresses via cell phone.

As a bridesmaid, it is a blessing to be told that you are wearing a specific dress, but may choose the style that fits you best, whether it be strapless, halter, etc. To be given a color scheme and told to choose whatever you like best is like hitting the proverbial jackpot. If you are lucky enough to be in this situation, what you must do next is proceed to send multiple mirror shots of yourself in white dresses. Bonus points to be won again if one of them is transparent, displaying your matching bra and panties. Who are you trying to impress, anyway?

1. Be “that” bridesmaid at the reception.

You know the one. The one that all the out-of-town guests discuss over the continental breakfast. The one that heard the bar was closing during dinner and stocked up on five vodka cranberries. The one that flashed the aforementioned underwear to your entire extended family. The subject of an inappropriate bet by all single groomsmen.

We all know how crazy a bride-to-be can behave. There are certainly times when, as a bridesmaid, you cannot recall a single reason why you would have agreed to stand next to this woman on her wedding day. If you’ve had enough of playing nice, follow these tips and be well on your way to becoming the worst possible bridesmaid that you can be.

This guest post was written by Cher, a 20-something, recently married student studying English and Marketing & Communications. She enjoys reading and writing and cannot get enough of weddings. She keeps that obsession alive and ignores academic obligations by writing and blogging about all things weddings.