The Five Shortest Celebrity Marriages (and Big Celebrity Wedding News)

Scarlett Johansson and Ryan Reynolds married this weekend in a small private wedding outside Vancouver, British Columbia. When previously asked about her engagement, Scarlett told reporters , “I mean, I’m 23. There’s no reason to rush into it. Everything feels very natural and relaxed.” Come again, Scarlett?

Truthfully, we are a little disappointed in Scarlett. All we wanted was to see her walk down the aisle in a vintage Valentino gown. Is that too much to ask? And we had her pegged as a bridezilla!

These days, it seems that celebrities prefer lackluster to lavish. No paparazzi. No castles. No helicopters. Yawn. For the love of bridezilla, please give us a glimpse of your gown or flowers or something. Your entire career was spent in the public eye and now you want a private moment – please.

What are the odds that Scarlett’s marriage outlasts the other celebrity marriages? She’s young, beautiful, and a major star – with these characteristics, it’s not looking good. Convinced she’ll stay married until those golden locks turn gray? Maybe our list of the shortest celebrity marriages will change your mind.

Britney Spears and Jason Alexander – When Britney was in her hey-day, everyone wanted to see her walk down the aisle. And some of us, admittedly, wanted to see her marry Justin Timberlake. Instead, she eloped with a no-name (Jason Alexander) in Vegas and stayed married for a whopping 2 days and seven hours. Bridezilla hint: impulsively buying chocolate ice cream is fine, impulsively picking a partner for life is not. Total time married: 2 days and seven hours.

Jennifer Lopez and Chris Judd – When it comes to short marriages, she’s a repeat offender. Her first marriage to Chris Judd lasted eight months (the average time it takes bridezilla to plan her wedding) and her second marriage to Ojani Noa lasted just over one year. Don’t forget about her brief engagement to Ben Affleck – otherwise known as pink-diamond gate, 2002. But J-Lo changed her ways and she happily settled down with husband Marc Anthony and twins. Bridezilla hint: sometimes the third time is a charm. Total time married: 8 months.

Pamela Anderson and Kid Rock – Another repeat offender. Pamela Anderson, the queen of rocky marriages to rock stars. We all remember her marriage (and those tattoo wedding rings) to (shudder) Tommy Lee. Her wedding to Kid Rock took place on a yacht near St. Tropez in the French Riviera. According to People.com, she donned a white string bikini. But their marriage at sea wasn’t considered legal because St. Tropez requires a one-month residency before you tie the knot. The couple re-married later in Beverly Hills. Bridezilla hint: if you’re planning a destination wedding, check out the marriage license requirements before you get on the plane. And no bride should walk down the aisle in a bikini, not even Pamela Anderson. Total time married: 2 months.

Cher and Gregg Allman – Bridezillas, be weary of spontaneous Vegas weddings. Three days after her divorce from Sonny Bono, Cher and Gregg Allman flew to Vegas and wed. However, she filed for divorce in a little over a week, citing his drug addiction as the problem. Bridezilla hint: get to know the man before you marry him. Total time married: 9 days.

Rudolph Valentino and Jean Acker – No one is completely sure, but this 1920’s celebrity marriage might beat Britney’s as the shortest of all time. After only six hours, Jean Acker locked Valentino out of the honeymoon suite. He left his bride at the hotel and headed home. Bridezilla hint: if you kick him out on your first day as a married couple, don’t expect him to come back. The couple split in 1919 but didn’t file a divorce until 1922. Total time married: 6 hours.