Tom Cruise: Bridezilla of All Time

Posted by on 05 Apr, 2007

Short Man Syndrome rears its head, wedding style! When it comes to bridezilla behavior unleashed, no one can compete with Tiny Tom Cruise, our Bridezilla of All Time!
No small achievement, the Bridezilla of All Time award goes only to the most obsessive, the most overbearing, the most controlling ‘Zilla you could imagine, and that description fits Tom Cruise to a (hee hee) T. From insisting she change her name from sweet, girlish Katie to Kate, to allegedly digging a hole for his bride to stand in so they’d be the same height in their wedding photos, Cruise has reached levels of Bridezilla behavior that average Bridezillas like us can hardly even fathom.
From his pre-wedding couch-jumping shenanigans with Oprah (the average Bridezilla frowns on furniture footprints) to his Eiffel Tower marriage proposal (uggh, so postcard), Cruise takes the platinum ring in every category.
A prime example of a Bridezilla gone overboard, Tom’s control issues made themselves obvious from the first date to now, with the most disturbing of Bridezilla behaviors in between. Read on about the cringe-worthy courtship of TomKat, notably one of the most unfortunate portmanteaus of all time.
Of course, nothing says “i adore you” like starting your courtship with a contract! Combining last names we understand, but first names too? Let a girl keep at least some autonomy-or at least let her come first in the name for once (we’re looking at you, Brangelina)! The sixteen year age difference raised enough eyebrows, and allegations ensued that Katie had been chosen from a passel of young potential Mrs. Cruises and locked into a five year contract guaranteeing she’d be with Tom for five years and give him one child. Admit it, Bridezillas – picking your beau from a line of virile, willing specimens of boycandy isn’t such an unattractive thought, but in theory, not in practice!
After steamrolling Katie’s dreams of a small Catholic wedding in her hometown of Toledo, Ohio in favor of a Scientology ceremony in an Italian castle (okay, we’ll grant him the superiority of the location), Tom took control of everything from the guestlist (not inviting Oprah? bad karma dude…) to the couture (Armani for all), Tom’s obsessive-compulsive touch was on every aspect of this ostentatious affair.
Tom even fell victim to one thing most Bridezillas are strong enough to resist – stress-eating! Rumor has it that Giorgio Armani was furious at Tom’s weight gain of nearly twenty pounds in the few months before the wedding. Alterations had to be made to Tom’s tux, and he even had to wear a girdle to thin out his midsection so his jacket would fit correctly! Unimpressed, Tom – any Bridezilla worth her cocktail salt knows it’s the man’s duty just as much as the woman’s to be svelte for the wedding day.
And that right there is Tommy’s trouble- usurping the role of Bridezilla that was rightfully Katie’s and taking it for himself! Not only did he take over the wedding plans, he took over Katie herself. Creepy! Short guys may try harder, but Tom Cruise is proof that’s not always a good thing.

Leave a Comment

  1. On 25 Jul, 2007, TomCruise#1Fan said:

    WAT THE HELL IS UR PROB?TOM CRUISE IS THE GREATEST GUY ON EARTH AND U R MAKING YOURSELVES LOOK LIKE BITCHES WRITING ABOUT HIM LIKE THAT.

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  2. On 27 Jul, 2007, Tom Cruise #1 Fan said:

    BESIDES KATIE SHOULD TAKE HIS LAST NAME…I MEAN KATIE HOLMES?THAT NAME IS SO STUPID.KATIE ACTS LIKE A TOTAL BITCH TO HIM.SHE THINKS SHE HAS TO BE TOP DOG WHEN REALLY TOM SHOULD BE THE BOSS IN THE RELATIONSHIP.AND IF THEY DIVORCE…TOM SHOULD TAKE FULL CUSTODY OF THEIR BEAUTIFUL (BECAUSE SHE DOESN’T LOOK LIKE MOMMY) BABY GIRL,SURI.

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  3. On 29 Oct, 2007, Curise is Overrated said:

    Talk about delusional!
    Suri Cruise looks so much like her mother that it makes one wonder if Cruise even fathered the kid (probably not).
    Second, Cruise is VERY overrated (no talent whatsoever) and he needs to come out of the closet, already.
    The person who composed these two posts was probably Cruise himself.

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  4. On 03 Jan, 2008, Indifferent towards Cruise said:

    well… I had to compensate the other two posters with my name.
    I discovered this web-site today and I know I’m terribly late in commenting this but I just wanted to add a few personal anectodes.
    I’m Italian and, as you can imagine, the TomKat wedding was quite The Event in our news for a couple of weeks… unfortunately for Tom’s #1 fan it was the Bridezilla side of the cerimony which got top spot. Not only was the majority of the population finding the murmored details of the Scientology cerimony laughable (frying-pans and cats as wedding gifts?), but the laughs reached their peak when news spread that:
    1) Veltroni (Major of Rome) had refused to put a temporary block (of three days!!) on the air space above the castle were the cerimony was held, because poor Tomzilla wouldn’t have journalists spy on him from the sky.
    2) the Catholic priest selected for “Katie’s” part of the cerimony refused to celebrate jointly with the Scientology minister.
    2) Andrea Bocelli refused to sing the “Ave Maria” at a Scientology wedding.
    Needless to say all our simpathy went to the three personalities and all we could hope for was that the affair would be over as quickly as possible.

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  5. On 03 Jan, 2008, Miss B said:

    No problem, Indifferent towards Cruise. It is very interesting to have a local perspective on the tabloid spectacle. Thanks for stopping by.

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  6. On 08 May, 2008, jonesscam@yahoo.com said:

    Katie Holmes should have known before they got married how Tom Cruise was. And I agree I still do not believe Suri is his child. Try DNA test or is he afraid to find out she is her ex BF s child hummmmm?

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  7. On 14 Sep, 2010, Lauren Paula said:

    I really like watching Tom Cruise’s movies. I think that he is a very great, gifted actor.

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