Posted by jade on 23 Apr, 2007
Well, well, what have we here? It seems the boys over at Groom Groove have been busy-busy forming opinions about Bridezilla in a recent article. In it, they refer to our bridal breed as “irritable, accusatory, dismissive, irrational, and demanding.” Ouch! You fellas kiss your fiance’s with those mouths?
While we at Bridezilla were pained by their less-than-pretty portrayal of bridezillas everywhere, we did think the article had some good points. To help out our Bridezilla-victimized brethren, we decided to expound on the Groom Groove article with some coping advice of our own, formatted specially for the uterus-impaired. Bon appetit!
1) Preemptive Pampering. While the Groom Groove gents are correct that “preparation is key,” the mere divvying up of roles will hardly protect you once the dire mood swings set in and reality becomes irrelevant. To really diffuse bridezilla episodes before they begin, a little preemptive pampering goes a long way. Meet her at the door with a glass of wine poured, give her a shoulder rub and her favorite Chanel afghan, and relax as her black rage swiftly softens into those little baby-voice complaints that couldn’t harm a single fella like yourself, let alone a small city.
2) Non-specific reassurance. Instead of playing the Blame Game, which is guaranteed to make any Bridezilla go bat-crazy ballistic, set justice aside in favor of general cajoling and calming. For example, if she demands to know why you didn’t tie bows on her bachelorette bikinis, don’t fire back that you wouldn’t touch her friends’ slimy swimwear with a ten foot pole and that it was her job in the first place. She’ll kill you. Rather, a simple, “Don’t worry baby, everything’s going to be okay,” gracefully evades any potentially disastrous promises and gives her nothing specific to rail against, thus she loses interest and moves on.