Warning: Major Diamond Recall


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Dear Bridezillas,
Recently on April 1st, a very naughty Groomzilla nephew took over and posted a recall notice for diamonds, thinking that Bridezillas everywhere could use a sense of humor about their weddings. Obviously he was not aware that Bridezillas don’t think in dates, they think in countdowns. (Just 85 more days till The Day.) He also didn’t think far enough ahead to realize that Bridezillas are allergic to cubic zirconias and would be able to spot a faux diamond at 20 paces. Hopefully, your gemstone was able to pass the “natural light” test and the “Diet Coke float” tests that he invented. Fear not, your diamonds are real and someone is mowing lawns and taking out the trash for a month.
For your reading enjoyment, here’s the real letter Bridezilla received from the Gemological Institute of America.
To whom it may concern,
I am writing to ask that you immediately remove the post from your site regarding the Gemological Institute of America dated April 1, 2009.
While we hope and believe this was intended to be a joke, judging from the calls we have been receiving from both jewelers and clients, it is clear the intent was lost in some cases. In addition, since it remains as the lead item in your blog after April 1st, it may only add to the confusion.
We therefore request that it be removed immediately.
Thank you for your assistance in this matter.
Gemological Institute of America

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